(This article originally appeared in the July 2014 issue of “Think” magazine. For parts 1 and 2, click here and here.)
Over the last few months this article series has focused on the disconnect between young people (Millennials) and the church. We examined the various ways congregations have responded to their growing inability to reach the hearts and minds of young people and we looked at the reasons why we shouldn’t ignore what they have to say due to some sense of superiority over those who left.
In last month’s article a Barna Group study was mentioned in which the top six reasons for Millennial disconnection from the church.  Those six reasons were as follows: churches seem overprotective, the experience of Christianity is shallow, the church is antagonistic to science, their experience with the church’s responses to sexuality are simplistic and judgmental, they wrestle with the exclusivity of Christianity, and the church feels unfriendly to those who doubt (Six Reasons). All of those objections or difficulties can be answered fairly easily, first and foremost in the home and secondly from the pulpit and Bible class. Therein lies the problem. Here are three issues parents, preachers, and teachers need to change.
First, influences must be monitored. It seems the best Christian parents are always being accused by the world (and, sadly, the church) of “sheltering” or “indoctrinating” their children. Isn’t that the point of parenting? When teachers, textbooks, peers, the internet, and television are all pushing children toward postmodernism or secular humanism, it’s up to parents to step in and stop that, and it’s up to the church’s leaders to teach parents how and why they should. Millennials leave the church because we’re too simplistic and judgmental on sexuality issues or because the church is anti-science. We know those lessons aren’t being taught at home, and we know they aren’t being taught in Bible class. Where do they learn those things? The generally accurate equation for faithfulness in the family is rather simple. Faithfulness occurs when: Home + Church > Peers + Culture (schools, internet, etc.). It’s up to parents to eliminate those compromising influences and win that battle, as God has placed responsibility in their hands. It’s up to the church to help parents grow in their faith so they can take it home with them and pass it on.
Second, questions must be answered. It’s entirely natural for young people to doubt, question, and wonder about the status of their salvation, their belief in God, doctrinal issues, and more. When they say that church feels unfriendly to those who doubt or that they have difficulty with the exclusivity of the church, we can see that their doubts and questions are being turned away rather than discussed. Again, these are discussions that should happen in the home first of all, but the church cannot afford to shy away from taking a strong stance on Christian evidences, Biblical inspiration, the truth of the church and inspired doctrines, and other such issues that can be difficult to understand. Doubt is only shunned by those who have no answers, and that’s the implicit message Millennials pick up when the church feels antagonistic or uncaring toward them. We have answers, and we need to be wide open with the truth and the difficult discussions.
Third, a true discipleship experience must be given. When they say church feels too overprotective and their experience is too shallow, it tells us that much of the youth ministry model of the last fifty years has failed them. In his book on young former Christians, Drew Dyck said it best. “They don’t want cute slogans and serenity. They don’t want pizza and video games. They want revolution and dynamism. They want unvarnished truth. They want a cause to live and die for. In other words, they want the true gospel” (Dyck 149-50). We can’t keep telling young people “You aren’t the future of the church, you ARE the church” at youth rallies and other events while sheltering them from involvement in the actual church or inducting them into some form of junior church. When they are baptized, they are Christians. Let them serve. Help train them to preach, teach, lead songs, and grow into the leaders the church needs. We can’t keep giving them a false sense of church that they never asked for and that fails to integrate them into the church as God intended.
By Jack Wilkie

 
“Six Reasons Young Christians Leave the Church,” Barna.org, 28 September 2011, https://www.barna.org/teens-next-gen-articles/528-six-reasons-young-christians-leave-church, 17 April 2014.
Drew Dyck, “Generation Ex-Christian,” Chicago: Moody Publishers, 2010.