by Savannah Cottrell
 
I’m an only child. Because of this, I learned growing up that if something needed to be done, or if someone needed help with something, I needed to step up and help or do whatever task was at hand. Often, this included lifting heavy things or simply doing a wide variety of chores around the house.
By that same token, though, I learned what my role was as a young woman of God. Sure, I learned to obey the Gospel and serve in His Church, but I learned that my role differed than that of my male counterparts. It was only recently that this lesson really sunk in.
When I was in college, I was working at the on-campus radio station, and we were getting ready for a particular event that involved transporting lots of equipment from one building on campus to another. I’ll note here that there were more guys than girls present. Regardless, I automatically grabbed a small crate filled with various items and had a weight to it, but wasn’t unmanageable. It was then that one of my co-workers asked if my crate was too heavy, and he offered to carry it. I thanked him, but decided to still carry the crate myself. Fast-forward several minutes later, and during the second round of loading and item-gathering, I noticed something peculiar: the girls were stepping back while the guys took over and carried the heavy boxes and other items. Intrigued, I decided to hold back, too.
That, dear reader, is allowing chivalry to exist and to thrive.
I grew up well aware of chivalry. I knew that guys were supposed to open all doors for girls, and that guys were also supposed to take charge when it came to various other things. However, it didn’t hit me until that moment in the radio station that chivalry isn’t just a personality trait or a habit. It’s a way for men of God to fulfill their spiritual roles.
So, I want to share three things about chivalry that tie in to the roles God has given us as members of His Church.
1. Chivalry puts others before self. Whether you’re male or female, you can respect someone by putting their needs before your own. You can also allow others to do the same for you, so they too can be blessed. In this way, chivalry is an act of service, and it’s also an act of respect. It’s also in accordance with the Golden Rule as stated in Matthew 7:12 – “Therefore, whatever you want men to do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets.” By that token, you shouldn’t “cop out” when it comes to chivalry. For example, which gesture would mean more: mashing the handicap automatic door button to open the door for someone behind you as you’re walking in, or opening the door yourself and letting the person go ahead? Also, I’ve seen this put into practice for my entire life; my Dad still opens car doors for my Mom, no matter where we are or where we’re going. It makes me happy to see chivalry in practice like this on a daily basis.
So, to really follow the Golden Rule, the extra mile should definitely be taken, and you’ll feel all the better for it.
2. Chivalry allows us to fulfill our spiritual roles. The fact of the matter is that God gave different spiritual roles to men and women. Men are to be the heads of households, and women are to be the helpmeets in those households, just as Eve was created to be a helpmeet for Adam in Genesis 2:18-25. It’s important that children today are reared this way in a world where gender equality is a strongly debated topic. However, the scope of that leadership for women is different from men, and we as women need to acknowledge and respect that fact. So, I want to encourage my fellow ladies to allow guys to do as they are called, and to support them in doing so, from audibly thanking them for opening those doors to encouraging them when they serve in Church.
3. Chivalry is just one of many ways to demonstrate our faith. Let’s say you’re in public. You open the door for a complete stranger. That complete stranger may or may not thank you audibly, but chances are, there’s someone else nearby who saw you open that door. This is just one example of how we can show who we are and what we believe by our actions. 1 Peter 2:9 says: “But you are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, His own special people, that you may proclaim the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light.”
If enough people see that we as Christians are active participants of chivalry, they just might be able to see that we live our lives for a greater purpose in Christ.
So, the next time you hear someone make the excuse that chivalry is “dead,” take a look around. Thank those who help you throughout your daily life, and remember to do the same for others.
 
This article originally appeared in the November 2014 issue of Think Magazine. Print or download this article here.