{"id":5634,"date":"2018-01-06T16:22:47","date_gmt":"2018-01-06T22:22:47","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/tampaseo.expert\/focus\/?p=5634"},"modified":"2018-01-06T16:22:47","modified_gmt":"2018-01-06T22:22:47","slug":"out-of-wedlock-births","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/tampaseo.expert\/focus\/2018\/01\/06\/out-of-wedlock-births\/","title":{"rendered":"Out-of-Wedlock Births"},"content":{"rendered":"

By Brad Harrub, Ph.D<\/strong>
\n 
\nHaving looked into the tearful eyes of parents whose children have abandoned the Faith, I have learned there are a million miles between our children \u201cgoing through the motions\u201d in reference to their spiritual lives versus our children possessing hearts that dictate their actions. In this column, I plan to share with you what I hope to instill in the hearts of my own children and those whom I love.<\/i>\u00a0<\/span>
\n\u00a0<\/span>
\nThe stigma is long gone. There was a time in which having a baby out-of-wedlock would bring embarrassment to the couple involved and shame to the family. That is not the case today.\u00a0According to the Center for Disease control more than 40% of all\u00a0children born today are born to\u00a0unmarried women.\u00a0The concepts of \u201cshotgun weddings\u201d or \u201cillegitimate\u201d pregnancies are a thing of the past. Young people today watch as Hollywood celebrities celebrate having children outside of marriage. Television shows promote this trend to every age and\u00a0economic level.\u00a0<\/span>
\nIn far too many cases individuals who never intended to be married bring babies into the world.\u00a0And unlike Hollywood celebrities, these individuals are not financially\u00a0(or emotionally)\u00a0prepared to care for an unexpected baby.\u00a0They were just indulging in some selfish fun. Yet now, for many, it is the grandparents who find themselves suddenly put into the role of chief caregiver\u2014feeding and changing diapers.\u00a0This is not fair to the child or the grandparents.\u00a0<\/span>
\nWhile it would be nice if the church\u00a0was\u00a0not affected by the increase in out-of-wedlock births, the fact remains that we are.\u00a0 Many congregations find themselves torn as some petition for a baby shower while others try hard not to reward bad behavior.\u00a0In fact, some congregations have split over this emotionally charged issue.\u00a0<\/span>
\nHere is what I want to tell my children about out-of-wedlock births.<\/b>\u00a0<\/span>
\nLet me begin by\u00a0saying that if you ever find yourself in a pregnancy situation and you are not married please do\u00a0not abort the child. Your mom and I have talked to you repeatedly\u00a0about\u00a0our\u00a0unconditional love, and we will help you through this challenge.\u00a0No matter\u00a0what the situation, \u201cchildren\u00a0are<\/i>\u00a0a heritage from the Lord,\u2028The fruit of the womb\u00a0is<\/i>\u00a0a reward\u201d (Psalm 127:4).\u00a0There will be consequences to your actions, but we will still love you.\u00a0<\/span>
\nHaving\u00a0clarified\u00a0that,\u00a0let me point\u00a0out the obvious: there is a \u201ccure\u201d for\u00a0preventing\u00a0out-of-wedlock births, and that is to save yourself until marriage. Just like the HIV\/aids virus or other sexually transmitted diseases, this is one of those things that you\u00a0should not have to concern yourself with if you strive to walk the narrow path and live your life according to God\u2019s will.\u00a0<\/span>
\nIt is my prayer that your mother and father have seared your consciousness enough that you will always view sinful behavior as wrong. Even though society may relax or even embrace out-of-wedlock births, we hope that you fully understand God\u2019s view on fornication and the marriage bed (Hebrews 13:4). Remember, just because our society may approve of something does not mean God does.\u00a0<\/span>
\nWhile many unmarried individuals are quick to consider the pleasure found from sexual relations outside of marriage, few consider things like who would have legal custody if they found themselves as parents. Fewer still give any consideration to the financial obligations\u00a0that children bring into the picture. And the number of individuals who think about the spiritual\u00a0well-being\u00a0of a child born out-of-wedlock are probably almost non-existent.\u00a0<\/span>
\nNever forget that God had a plan for the family unit. Any time we violate His plan there are consequences to pay. For instance, fatherless homes account for:\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>
\n53% of teen mothers
\n63% of youth suicides
\n71% high school dropouts
\n85% of youths in prison
\n90% of homeless\/runaway children\u00a0<\/span>
\nBut this is only the beginning. A recent Heritage Foundation report demonstrates that removing a father from the picture also results in\u00a0children more likely to have emotional and behavioral problems; be physically abused; smoke, drink, and use drugs; be aggressive; engage in violent, delinquent, and criminal behavior; have poor school performance; be expelled from school; and drop out of high school.\u00a0The effect of\u00a0having a father in the picture is\u00a0very pronounced.\u00a0<\/span>
\nWe\u2019ve talked at home\u00a0about walking on the narrow path. This is one of those areas in which the world is telling you to join them on the broad way. However, don\u2019t be conformed to the world. Seek the narrow or difficult way (Matthew 7).\u00a0 My prayer is that you will bring many children into the world\u2014but according to God\u2019s schedule (marriage first), and not your own schedule. Keep striving.\u00a0<\/span>
\nLove ,\u00a0<\/span>
\nDad\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

By Brad Harrub, Ph.D   Having looked into the tearful eyes of parents whose children have abandoned the Faith, I have learned there are a million miles between our children \u201cgoing through the motions\u201d in reference to their spiritual lives versus our children possessing hearts that dictate their actions. In this column, I plan to […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"give_campaign_id":0,"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[46,52,66],"tags":[650,904,120,236,1270,248],"class_list":["post-5634","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-children","category-family","category-think-excerpts","tag-birth","tag-brad-harrub","tag-family","tag-heart-of-the-matter","tag-january-2013","tag-sex","et-doesnt-have-format-content","et_post_format-et-post-format-standard"],"yoast_head":"\nOut-of-Wedlock Births - Focus Press<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/tampaseo.expert\/focus\/2018\/01\/06\/out-of-wedlock-births\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Out-of-Wedlock Births - Focus Press\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"By Brad Harrub, Ph.D   Having looked into the tearful eyes of parents whose children have abandoned the Faith, I have learned there are a million miles between our children \u201cgoing through the motions\u201d in reference to their spiritual lives versus our children possessing hearts that dictate their actions. 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