{"id":5568,"date":"2018-01-03T13:02:35","date_gmt":"2018-01-03T19:02:35","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/tampaseo.expert\/focus\/?p=5568"},"modified":"2018-01-03T13:02:35","modified_gmt":"2018-01-03T19:02:35","slug":"elders-caring-homosexual","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/tampaseo.expert\/focus\/2018\/01\/03\/elders-caring-homosexual\/","title":{"rendered":"Elders Caring for Those Who are Homosexual"},"content":{"rendered":"

By Matt Vega<\/strong>
\nMany of us have a long-time friend or a close\u00a0relative that is\u00a0actively involved in\u00a0homosexuality\u00a0or a former\u00a0or struggling with same-sex attraction.\u00a0Therefore, it should come as no surprise that there\u00a0is\u00a0a growing number of church members struggling with homosexuality.\u00a0How should church leaders respond? Do\u00a0we urge repentance? Do we\u00a0disfellowship\u00a0them? Do we just treat them as if nothing is wrong?\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>
\nFirst, elders need to see that the issue of homosexuality is part of a much bigger problem in our society with regard to sexual values and morality. Traditional marriage is on the decline. The widespread adoption of no-fault divorce laws in most states means that a person can, for whatever reason, unilaterally end\u00a0his\u00a0marriage. It gives men the option to desert their wives for younger prospects, and it lets women give up more easily on less-than-storybook-perfect husbands. There has also been a dramatic increase in cohabitation and more sexual activity outside of marriage generally. Non-marital sex (both pre-marital and extra-marital) breaks the God-ordained connection between sex and marriage. Thus, the problem facing our society goes well beyond homosexuality.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>
\nAccording to the Scripture, homosexuals are no worse sinners\u00a0in God’s eyes than any other sinners.\u00a0James wrote that whosoever has broken the least of God’s commands is guilty of breaking them all (James\u00a02:10). While homosexuality is called an\u00a0\u201cabomination\u201d\u00a0to\u00a0God, so\u00a0is\u00a0adultery, murder, lying,\u00a0and all forms of wickedness (Proverbs\u00a06:16-19; 8:7; 11:1, 20;16:5; 17:15; Ezekiel\u00a022:11). While the Bible does teach that homosexuality is\u00a0\u201ccontrary to\u00a0nature\u201d\u00a0(Romans\u00a01:26), this does not mean it is more sinful than, say, adultery. Rather Paul\u00a0describes homosexuality as\u00a0\u201cunnatural\u201d\u00a0to emphasize the fact that people can recognize it is immoral even without the aid of special revelation; therefore ignorance of what the Bible teaches on the subject is no excuse (Romans\u00a01:20). In fact, an argument can be made that the church actually has a greater duty to preach and teach about heterosexual sins that might not be as obvious.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>
\nFor example, elders need to remind the church that what the world calls cohabitation and\u00a0no fault-divorce and remarriage, the Bible calls the sin of fornication (1 Thessalonians\u00a04:3) and\u00a0the sin of adultery (Matthew\u00a019:9). In order to address the real problem elders must\u00a0approach all\u00a0sexual sin in a consistent, principled way.\u00a0This means not only emphasizing that God regulates all sexual behavior (Genesis\u00a02:24; Hebrews\u00a013:4; Matthew\u00a019:9),\u00a0but\u00a0affirming that He is willing to forgive all sexual sins (1 Corinthians\u00a06:11).\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>
\nSecond, elders need to show homosexuals that they care. Church leaders must approach homosexuality with the same level of understanding and sense of urgency with which we have confronted heterosexual sin. Of course, we must teach that\u00a0homosexual behavior is contrary to God\u2019s will.\u00a0However, it takes more than quoting Scripture to guide someone out of homosexuality. Elders must be patient and show a caring attitude. Instead of ignoring or being fearful about this particular category of sexual sin, elders must actively help those who struggle with feelings of same-sex attraction. Ministering to homosexuals and former\u00a0homosexuals involves more than referring them to a third-party professional for counseling. It requires a united church effort. They have to feel welcome to come and sit down beside us during the worship service. Parents need to feel like they can tell the elders that their son went off to college and is experiencing some same-sex attraction and know that the elders will not be afraid to ask for the prayers of the church.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>
\nThird, elders need to become more knowledgeable about homosexuality. Just like those addicted to\u00a0porngraphy\u00a0or other irresponsible sexual behavior, those struggling with homosexuality must choose not to act on that attraction each and every day. While the desire may diminish over time, elders must realize that many individuals may always struggle with this particular sin. Elders must understand their struggle and help them find that space that James wrote about between being tempted and giving in to the temptation (James\u00a01:12-15), and to stop feeding or making provision for sin (Romans 13:14).\u00a0\u00a0More importantly, elders must constantly remind them of the Gospel message of hope and the\u00a0power of the grace of God to not only manage\u00a0the behavior, but to get to the causes of same-sex desires.\u00a0<\/span>
\nFourth, elders need to pray for wisdom when dealing with homosexuality. This is one of the most important lessons to be learned from lawsuits filed against the church over the last three decades. Churches in Oklahoma, Tennessee,\u00a0and other states have been sued by wayward church members\u00a0disfellowshipped\u00a0for refusing to repent of habitual sins. Recently, the U.S. Supreme Court in\u00a0Hosanna-Tabor Evangelical Lutheran Church and School v. E.E.O.C<\/i>.\u00a0(132\u00a0S.Ct\u00a0694,\u00a02011)\u00a0reaffirmed a church’s First Amendment right to govern itself; therefore, courts will generally dismiss these church discipline cases on constitutional grounds. However, when the sin at issue is particularly embarrassing, such as adultery, a few plaintiffs have been awarded tens of thousands of dollars in damages because of the way those members were confronted by church leaders, or because of the way certain details of the wayward member\u2019s sins were publicized to the whole church or\u00a0even\u00a0to nearby congregations.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>
\nBecause of the social stigma associated with homosexuality, church leaders must be particularly circumspect when addressing the sin publicly. Invasion of privacy and intentional infliction of emotional distress claims could be successfully brought against an unsuspecting church when the underlying sin being addressed is homosexuality. Therefore churches should (1) faithfully follow the Lord’s model for progressive church discipline\u00a0which presupposes a close fellowship\u00a0(Matthew\u00a018:17-18; Titus 3:10; 2 Thessalonians\u00a03:6-15; 1 Timothy\u00a05:20; Galatians\u00a06:1); (2) regularly educate their members on the permanent nature of church membership as an adopted\u00a0child of God (Ephesians\u00a02:13-22; Romans\u00a08:16; Philippians\u00a02:15; 1 John\u00a03:1), (3) consistently utilize church discipline, as a last resort, for all sexual sins and not single out homosexuality, (4)\u00a0speak with the wayward member in person rather than sending a formal letter and\u00a0carefully word any announcements made to the entire congregation to ensure you are\u00a0\u201cspeaking the truth in love\u201d\u00a0(Ephesians\u00a04:15),\u00a0(5) cautiously limit information regarding the details of a member’s sin to those with a\u00a0legitimate\u00a0\u201cneed-to-know,\u201d\u00a0(6) rigorously avoid relying on unsubstantiated rumors,\u00a0(2 Corinthians\u00a012:20), and (7) exclusively focus on the spiritual needs of the church member and the church at large.\u00a0<\/span>
\nFifth, elders need to approach the wrongness of homosexuality as a matter of objective, absolute moral truth. Legal attacks are increasingly trying to drive a wedge between faith and reason.\u00a0They argue that laws based on traditional Christian moral values reflect a personal or private moral view that is essentially\u00a0\u201cirrational.\u201d\u00a0For example, a federal judge in San Francisco struck down California’s Proposition 8 by declaring\u00a0in\u00a0Perry v. Schwarzenegger<\/i>\u00a0that there was no\u00a0\u201crational basis\u201d\u00a0for amending the state constitution to read,\u00a0“Only marriage between a man and a woman is valid and recognized in California.\u201d\u00a0Since all valid laws require a rational basis,\u00a0the amendment was struck down as unconstitutional.\u00a0Church leaders must train their members to defend the reasonableness of the Christian view of marriage.\u00a0This will require teaching: (1) how to defend the reliability of the Bible as the final authority on important matters such as sex and\u00a0marriage; (2) how to apply basic principles of Biblical interpretation (so-called Biblical hermeneutics) and respond to those who read the Bible improperly; and (3) how to give reasons that others who do not share our view that the Bible is the final authority can still grasp.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>
\nSixth and finally, elders need to remember that is never too early to start caring about those\u00a0who may be at risk of developing same-sex attractions. Church leaders need to understand\u00a0that upbringing is often a\u00a0\u201ccontributing factor\u201d\u00a0in the sin of homosexuality. Growing up is not easy, and growing up in a single-parent home without a father or mother around is a lot like being put in a boxing ring with one hand tied behind your back. And now that at least a dozen states in this country recognize\u00a0\u201csame-sex\u201d\u00a0marriages and many of these homosexual couples are choosing to adopt children, church leaders must be ready to help children that live with gay parents cope with the unique difficulties they will face.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>
\nThe basic fact remains that children\u00a0benefit from\u00a0a father and a mother.\u00a0Imagine there\u00a0is\u00a0a little boy on your son’s little league baseball team that has\u00a0two moms. Does the fact he does not know his biological father make any difference?\u00a0Isn\u2019t he\u00a0likely to feel different from all the other players?\u00a0This circumstance is certainly not his fault, and the problem is not simply\u00a0prejudice towards his gay parents.\u00a0Although the research on homosexual-led families is still very new and relatively scarce, two new studies show that kids do best in low-conflict marriages between the biological mother and biological father (L. Marks 2012; M.\u00a0Rgenerus\u00a02012).\u00a0According to research studies, a child with same sex parents is likely to be confused about his or her sexual identity and less chaste (Golombok\u00a0and\u00a0Tasker, 1996: Stacey and\u00a0Biblarz, 2001). Of course many children reared in traditional father-mother families also experience childhood trauma, develop patterns of rebellion, or feel a deep-seated need to escape from all kinds of personal problems that leads them to engage in reckless sexual behavior. In any\u00a0case however, the church can make a difference by providing young people with good Christian men and women role models and mentors.\u00a0It is critical that elders keep this goal at the forefront when working with parents and youth ministers to shepherd the youngest among us.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>
\n\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

By Matt Vega Many of us have a long-time friend or a close\u00a0relative that is\u00a0actively involved in\u00a0homosexuality\u00a0or a former\u00a0or struggling with same-sex attraction.\u00a0Therefore, it should come as no surprise that there\u00a0is\u00a0a growing number of church members struggling with homosexuality.\u00a0How should church leaders respond? Do\u00a0we urge repentance? Do we\u00a0disfellowship\u00a0them? Do we just treat them as if […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"give_campaign_id":0,"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[32,26,66],"tags":[542,1051,22,1237,1232],"class_list":["post-5568","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-church","category-marriagehomosexuality","category-think-excerpts","tag-elders","tag-feature","tag-homosexuality","tag-matt-vega","tag-november-2012","et-doesnt-have-format-content","et_post_format-et-post-format-standard"],"yoast_head":"\nElders Caring for Those Who are Homosexual - Focus Press<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/tampaseo.expert\/focus\/2018\/01\/03\/elders-caring-homosexual\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Elders Caring for Those Who are Homosexual - Focus Press\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"By Matt Vega Many of us have a long-time friend or a close\u00a0relative that is\u00a0actively involved in\u00a0homosexuality\u00a0or a former\u00a0or struggling with same-sex attraction.\u00a0Therefore, it should come as no surprise that there\u00a0is\u00a0a growing number of church members struggling with homosexuality.\u00a0How should church leaders respond? 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